


Five Times Jane and Thor Broke Up and One Time They Didn't

by shinyopals



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: BAMF Jane Foster, F/M, Fluff, Jane Foster Loves Science, POV Jane Foster, SO MUCH FLUFF, Thor Is Not Stupid, bite me marvel, marvel is really stupid though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-03
Updated: 2017-04-03
Packaged: 2018-10-14 13:01:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10536978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shinyopals/pseuds/shinyopals
Summary: ‘I didn’t know you were in the country, Jane,’ said Jane's grandmother. ‘Of course, nobody tells me anything.’‘It’s just a very last minute thing,’ said Jane, which Thor knew to be a lie. ‘I only arrived yesterday-’ another lie, ‘and I’m just on the way to work and thought I’d stop by and see Mom.’ This too was not true. ‘This is my friend Thor,’ she added, almost casually. ‘He’s been helping me with some work so we’re driving into the university together.’ This seemed the most flagrant of all the lies, but Thor decided not to let it show.It's not always convenient to be a relationship, so sometimes Jane and Thor have to make sacrifices.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Very, very much a reaction to Marvel making a goddamn terrible decision and Kevin Feig being The Worst.
> 
> Thanks as ever to [Niobium](http://archiveofourown.org/users/niobium)!

** One **

Thor pulled down the seat sunshade to inspect his reflection in the small mirror for one final time as Jane pulled into a driveway. He judged his appearance suitable. His hair was tidy without being rigid, tied back to emulate the styles Midgardian men wore, but with a few small braids as was his preference. His face was clean. The small amount of make-up he wore subtle enough as to be hidden. He knew on Midgard few would expect him to wear any, but that day it was important to look his best. He inspected his eyes for smudges and, finding none, clucked his tongue in satisfaction and folded away the mirror once more. He turned his hands to his clothes, brushing off a stray hair and a few small motes of dust. Jane’s car was tidy enough, but the rich red of his coat showed imperfections readily.

‘You know you’re adorable, right?’ said Jane, sitting next to him. She sent him a smile which he mirrored automatically, and reached over to rest one hand on his. ‘You’ve got nothing to worry about. She’s gonna love you. Everyone does.’

Thor made to object - he was hardly worrying - but before he could marshal his arguments, Jane pushed open the car door. 

They approached the house that was at once familiar and new. Indeed, Thor had spent many a fine hour there just a few months before with Jane, and Darcy, Erik and Ian. There Jane had first invited him into her home and her life and in truth he had not looked back. Then, when she had studied the lingering aftereffects of the Convergence to exhaustion and attended many events of importance in the university in London, they had decamped to Gaborone with Darcy in tow to study the stars in the southern hemisphere. From there they had travelled to Taipei to visit some colleagues of Jane. And in that time, Jane’s mother had returned to her home in London, and had persuaded Jane to visit. This house was not Jane’s, but someone else’s.

Thor smoothed his hair as Jane pressed the doorbell. ‘Feels weird not to have a key,’ she remarked, and took his hand once more. Thor heard footsteps inside the house. He swallowed and shifted on his feet. The door opened.

Jane dropped his hand. ‘Granny?’ she said, eyes widening. ‘I didn’t know you’d be here!’

The woman who greeted them was short and stooped, with white hair and wrinkled skin, but the swooping gaze which took in both Jane and Thor was fiercer than Thor would have expected.

‘Jane,’ she said. ‘Ellen didn’t say you’d be coming. Typical of her to be disorganised.’

Jane gave her grandmother a very fixed smile as another woman appeared on the stairs. She too was short, age somewhere in between that of Jane and her grandmother, with brown hair flecked with grey. Behind Jane’s grandmother’s back she gave Jane a grimace of apology.

‘Charlotte,’ she said winsomely. ‘There was no need for you to get up, I was just getting the door!’

‘Hmph,’ muttered Charlotte. ‘Where’s my tea? You said you would make some half an hour ago.’

‘Just boiling,’ said the woman, who Thor assumed must be Jane’s mother, Ellen Ullman. ‘You know how these modern day kettles are.’ She began to nudge Charlotte inside, leaving Jane and Thor on the doorstep. She mouthed ‘RUN’ over her shoulder at Jane, who laughed into her hand.

‘That’s my dad’s mom, Charlotte Foster,’ muttered Jane to Thor. ‘She’s, um. Look, I’m really sorry but just follow my lead on this one, please.’

‘Of course,’ said Thor, frowning.

He followed Jane into the sitting room, where Jane’s mother was making Charlotte Foster comfortable with a blanket and some cushions. Jane gestured for him to sit, and then sat beside him. She seemed further from him than normal, and did not take his hand as she might ordinarily. Thor kept his distance politely, as something in the way she sat told him not to approach.

‘I didn’t know you were in the country, Jane,’ said Mrs Foster. ‘Of course, nobody tells me anything.’

‘It’s just a very last minute thing,’ said Jane, which Thor knew to be a lie. ‘I only arrived yesterday-’ another lie, ‘and I’m just on the way to work and thought I’d stop by and see Mom.’ This too was not true. ‘This is my friend Thor,’ she added, almost casually. ‘He’s been helping me with some work so we’re driving into the university together.’ This seemed the most flagrant of all the lies, but Thor decided not to let it show.

‘Very nice to meet you, Thor,’ said Jane’s mother. 

‘It is an honour, Mrs Ullmann,’ said Thor. This was not how he’d hoped it to be. He jumped to his feet to shake her hand. As he looked into her face, he could see a hidden smile in her eyes that reminded him very much of Jane and he felt a tiny part of himself relax. 

‘Ellen, please,’ she said.

‘Isn’t he that alien, Thor?’ demanded Mrs Foster.

‘Uh,’ said Jane. She evidently was not prepared for this.

‘I am indeed, Mrs Foster,’ said Thor politely. It seemed as though she already knew, so a lie would be pointless.

Mrs Foster huffed in Jane’s direction. ‘You and your father, God rest his soul, were always the same. UFOs and little green men. There are far nobler reasons to study the universe.’

‘I mean, in mine and Dad’s defense...’ said Jane, trailing off. She looked at Thor. Then she looked back to Mrs Foster. Ellen coughed into her hand. 

Mrs Foster eyed her but was not done with Jane. ‘One of my students said you were… stepping out with him,’ she said, nodding towards Thor. ‘He said he read it in a magazine.’ Her eyes were narrowed suspiciously. Thor shifted on his feet, wondering if he should make some excuse and leave.

Jane gave an impressively convincing look of confusion. ‘Oh, you know what tabloid gossip is like,’ she said. ‘We’re just working together because he knows about space.’

‘Hmph,’ said Mrs Foster. ‘Where’s my tea?’

‘I’ll just go and get it now,’ said Ellen. 

‘May I help in any way?’ offered Thor. Jane raised an eyebrow at him and he realised too late she might assume he was abandoning her. 

‘Sure thing, thanks,’ said Ellen, giving him a smile. 

As he followed her into the kitchen, he heard Mrs Foster ask when Jane planned to cease travelling, settle down, wed, and produce a child. He thought it might be better he was not there to hear her answer.

In the kitchen, he assembled mugs, milk and sugar, whilst Ellen found tea bags.

‘Sorry about this,’ Ellen said. ‘She turned up, unannounced, telling me she’s staying for a few days while she does some shopping in London. If I’d had five minutes to myself I’d’ve texted Jane and told her to stay away.’

Thor smiled politely. He was not certain there was anything he could say.

‘Anyway, let’s have a look at you,’ she said, stepping back and taking him in with a slight grin. Thor hesitated, unsure what was expected. ‘Such a shame Mark - Jane’s dad - isn’t here to see this. He’d have five million things to ask you about other planets.’ Thor gave a tentative smile as Ellen picked up the kettle. ‘All I’ve got is apologising for my mother-in-law.’

‘There is nothing to apologise for,’ said Thor. He paused for a moment. ‘I do not fully understand, but I hope nothing I say or do will offend.’

‘Oh, Charlotte’s just not a very nice person,’ said Ellen flatly as she stirred the teacups. ‘She only forgave Mark for marrying a Jew on his deathbed. Until then Jane all but hadn’t had a second grandmother.’

‘Oh,’ said Thor, frowning as he turned this information over in his mind. ‘I am sorry. That must have been difficult.’

Ellen shrugged. ‘You can’t always have your parents’ approval,’ she said. ‘It was much easier when she wasn’t talking to me.’ She clinked the mugs together. ‘Less tea wasted on undeserving in-laws! Shall we? I don’t want to leave Jane alone with her for too long. We’ll have a proper dinner when she’s not around. Jane’s told me lots about you.’

‘Good?’ said Thor hopefully, as he picked up the remaining two mugs of tea and followed Ellen back.

‘Oh, you’re back,’ greeted Mrs Foster. She turned to Thor. ‘Jane’s been telling me about your work. I can’t say I approve of you running around pretending to be a god though. That feels like blasphemy.’

‘Er,’ said Thor. He briefly considered whether introducing Mrs Foster to his father would be possible. It seemed like they would keep each other occupied.

‘Are you married?’ asked Mrs Foster.

Thor considered for a moment. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘Her name is Sif. We have a daughter called Thrúd. Both are fearsome warriors.’ Jane caught his eye and raised her eyebrows skeptically, but she had started this. He winked.

‘Well... good,’ said Mrs Foster, momentarily wrong-footed, which Thor took as a victory. 

~*~

‘Does Sif know you pretend to be married to her?’ asked Jane later, once they had escaped the clutches of her grandmother.

Thor, relaxing again after an afternoon of awkward pretense, leaned back in his seat to watch her drive. ‘We have before,’ he said mildly. ‘Sometimes it is more convenient to be married. We only used the story a few times - to protect Sif’s reputation amongst the people of Midgard with whom we stayed mostly - but it has ended up in the Norse legends that purport to be the story of my family.’ He grinned. ‘Marriage instantly makes me feel older and more respectable.’

Jane snorted. ‘Well Granny approved,’ she said. ‘At least she didn’t then accuse us of having an affair.’

‘Jane, if I might ask, why-’

‘-did I say we weren’t dating?’ finished Jane. ‘Really, she’s just awful. If you can be bigoted against it, she is. Raging anti-semite. Racist. Homophobic. Anti-immigrant. Which probably includes alien immigrants, knowing her. Plus I’m not meant to have had sex before marriage. There’s no way I would admit to having a boyfriend, let alone one who isn’t even human.’

‘Forgive me, but why fall into line? I can see it annoys you. Would not you prefer to simply tell her it is not her business?’ 

‘Oh, sure,’ said Jane. ‘Completely. She didn’t even acknowledge me until Dad died when I was twelve. Not ever talking to her would be an improvement. But…’ She coughed and tucked some of her hair behind her ears. ‘Granny’s an astronomer too - she got my dad into it - and she’s got some amazing antique telescopes and books and if I get disinherited then I don’t get any of that. So.’ She coughed. ‘I am a bad person. But they’re so amazing. They’re made of brass and wood and they’re so pretty. And Granny knew Vera Rubin back in the day and she’s got notes and letters from her and I want them.’

Thor couldn’t help but laugh. ‘A cause well worthy of a temporary remarriage to Sif,’ he said. Jane beamed at him, and he felt instantly warmed. ‘Just as long as I am not expected to produce an actual child,’ he added, and Jane laughed.

 

** Two **

‘Darcy, I think we’re going to be late.’

‘Jane, babe, relax. Stop running. If you get all sweaty your make-up’s going to run. I’ve timed this perfectly. We can even stop for coffee.’

‘Yes, I know, I just- I shouldn’t be late.’

‘Trust me,’ said Darcy, taking Jane’s arm. ‘When have I ever got this stuff wrong? Just breathe. It’ll be fine.’

‘This is so stupid.’

‘No, this is so _brilliant_. Your first ever book signing! You’re, like, a celebrity.’

‘No I’m not,’ said Jane, rolling her eyes. She pushed hair back behind her ears and silently cursed herself for putting on any make-up at all. It was hardly a movie premiere. She’d written a book about physics. That was it. ‘Oh god, what if nobody shows up?’

‘ _Jane_ ,’ said Darcy. ‘Some people will show up. You’re signing at the campus bookstore. There are other nerds here. Plus some people are gonna want to get a glimpse of Thor.’

‘Oh, yeah, that really makes me feel better,’ said Jane, as they ducked into a coffee shop.

‘Well you did write a book about wormholes with an entire chapter on the legend of the Bifrost, another on the Battle of Manhattan and another on the attack on London. People are going to be hoping for an alien experience. Where the hell is he, anyway? He should definitely be here.’

‘He had a thing,’ said Jane vaguely, as she hunted in her purse for her Starbucks loyalty card.

‘That “thing” better be the end of the universe,’ said Darcy.

‘I think it was only Australia that’s at risk, not the entire universe,’ said Jane. ‘Two lattes, please, one with three shots of coffee,’ she added to the Barista. 

‘Yes, because three shots of caffeine will definitely calm your jitters,’ muttered Darcy under her breath.

‘‘I am OK with him saving a city instead of watching me sign books for, like, three people,’ continued Jane, deciding ignoring Darcy was the best choice.

‘Still,’ said Darcy stubbornly. ‘I’m sure the others have got it.’

Jane smiled a little. She appreciated Darcy’s support and she did wish Thor could there, but things happened. She had a feeling if she wanted a relationship with someone who would definitely be able to show up to her book signings, she would probably have to pick someone who wasn’t into saving Australia.

As they left the coffee shop, they were approached by a woman in her mid-twenties with an expensive looking camera on a strap around her neck.

‘Miss Foster-’

‘Dr Foster,’ corrected Darcy, and Jane shot her friend a smile. 

‘Dr Foster, sorry,’ said the woman. ‘I was wondering if you had any comment on Thor’s new relationship with Annie Stratten.’

Jane blinked. ‘What?’

‘Looks like you only broke up a couple of weeks ago. He seems to be moving on quickly, don’t you think?’

‘Who’s Annie Stratten?’ she asked, wondering if it was someone they’d met.

‘ _Really_ , Jane?’ said Darcy. Jane frowned. ‘She’s an actress,’ explained Darcy. ‘Playing Black Widow in the new movie about the attack on New York.’

‘ _Oh_ ,’ said Jane. Tony had cut a deal where some of the movie proceeds went to charity in exchange for the Avengers doing a bit of press about it. Jane seemed to remember Thor had been to a dinner party thing only the previous week. She’d declined to attend on the basis that she had work to do. 

The journalist handed Jane her cellphone which had a picture of Annie Stratten and Thor smiling at each other. ‘She’s very pretty,’ said Jane. She was. She had lovely long red hair which looked very nice with the emerald green ball gown she was wearing in the picture. Thor was dressed to the nines, and she thought that was the outfit from the specific party she was thinking of, so that must have been when they’d met. 

‘Anyway,’ said Darcy, cutting in. ‘We’ve got to go. Things to do. Running late.’

‘Just a few words-’ began the reporter.

‘No comment,’ said Darcy.

‘Actually,’ said Jane. ‘I have an idea.’ She was pretty sure she heard Darcy groan.

~*~

‘Jane?’

‘Mmm?’ she looked up from her work across the couch at Thor. Australia was safe and he’d returned a few hours earlier, greeted her in his typically enthusiastic way, and now Jane was feeling pleasantly tired as she idly poked through some gravitational data. Thor, wearing only sweatpants and looking disgustingly perfect, was lounging with her.

‘Why does the internet report that you are “very happy for me” in my new relationship with film star Annie Stratten?’

‘Uh,’ said Jane. She squirmed under his gaze. ‘I might have done a bad thing.’ 

He raised an eyebrow. To avoid him for a moment longer, Jane googled herself and had a look through the story. It wasn’t as bad as she feared, and it did exactly what she wanted. ‘So I got free publicity for my book in a slightly unorthodox way,’ she said. She held up her phone to Thor so he could see the picture of her with her book at the signing.

His lip twitched. ‘I am aware,’ he said gravely. ‘I have that same picture on my screen. You look beautiful. And apparently single.’

She blushed. ‘I’m sorry. I probably should have… not done that.’ She twisted her hands together. ‘I just… I really want people to know about my work. And the journalist just sort of assumed we’d broken up so I promised her a quote _after_ she covered my book signing.’

Thor rested his face in his hands, shoulders shaking, and she had a brief moment of panic that she’d properly fucked things up before she realised he was laughing silently. ‘Betrayed by my truest love,’ he muttered, shaking his head. 

‘Shut up,’ she mumbled. ‘What’s she like, anyway, Annie Stratten? Darcy’s been complaining all afternoon that she doesn’t get invited to these swanky parties.’

‘I’ll have to take her next time,’ said Thor, ‘since by all accounts I have been abandoned.’ He sent her a pout that was so extremely melodramatic she laughed. ‘A prince of Asgard attending a party unaccompanied,’ he continued mournfully, ‘only to then be denied entirely a week after!’

‘Ugh, fine, I’ll attend the next stupid party with you next time,’ said Jane.

Thor grinned in a way which suggested she’d just done exactly what he wanted and she poked him with her foot.

‘In truth I made friends with Annie Stratten because Natasha had informed her Steve was unattached, and he is terrible at talking with any women, let alone those he would have to politely turn down. So I aided him by becoming a distraction.’

Jane snorted. ‘Poor Steve,’ she said. She definitely sympathised. Not that she got as many offers as Steve did by a long shot. But if flirting was hard, then deliberately not flirting was even worse.

Thor shrugged. ‘He will have to learn some day,’ he said, ‘but Annie is classically trained and we had much to talk about. We discussed the Norse legends, and also your famous writer Shakespeare. She is English, and has offered to obtain for me some tickets to see a play she will perform in in London once the Avengers film publicity is finished.’ He paused. There was a glint in his eye. ‘If only I had a girlfriend with whom to see it.’ 

Despite the fact that this was arguably her fault, Jane threw a cushion at his head.

 

** Three **

Jane’s work site had been ransacked.

Thor had landed at speed, and for a moment he stood stock still, surveying the scene in front of him. It was a mess. Equipment was broken and toppled to the floor. The doors to their rented vehicle lay open. Papers were scattered in the wind. Neither Jane nor Darcy were anywhere to be seen. A rush of fear and anger bubbled through him and for a moment he could think of nothing but Jane.

He took a deep breath to steady himself, and reached for his cellphone. He had been gone but two days, fighting Hydra with the Avengers. Surely whoever this was had not _lain in wait_...?

There was a voicemail from Jane. He had missed it. Cursing at the phone and at himself, he navigated the software to listen to the message. At first there was silence but for laboured breaths, then a shout of ‘HEY!’ from a male voice, then a crack. Then the message ended. It had been left for him only six hours before, which was, at least, a small comfort.

Thor stepped out of the small crater his handing had created to search the site. He was no expert in tracking compared to Sif or Fandral, but he knew the art well enough and could read the ground here where no pains had been taken to hide any steps. Heavy-booted foot marks covering the site. Sturdy, of the type worn by Midgard’s militaries, that much he could guess. They were too numerous for him to clearly distinguish but he believed there to have been at least ten, and they had certainly showed no regard for what they found, stomping and breaking for no good reason. 

He circled cautiously, keeping his own tread light and even. Eventually he came across a clear path of all the boots leading away into the woods. His heart leapt at the sight of a smaller print within them. Someone had been taken - half dragged if the marks were any indication. That someone, at least, had been upright. He could not be sure if it was Jane or Darcy, or perhaps even both.

‘Jane!’ he called. ‘Darcy!’ His voice echoed through the trees as thunder rumbled. He did not trouble to tame it, although he forced back rain that threatened. 

He pulled out his Avengers earpiece once more and directed it to call Stark.

‘I need you to trace all technology, vehicles, internet signals and cameras near the location I stand since… approximately six hours ago,’ he barked.

‘Well hello to you too, buddy,’ said Stark.

‘Jane is missing,’ said Thor. ‘I am at her worksite. It has been destroyed. Booted men were here, at least ten. Find her cellphone. She left me a message six hours ago.’

He heard Stark suck in a breath. ‘Be with you in a sec. I’ll patch in Cap and the others too.’

‘THOR!’

Thor spun in his tracks, but even before he’d fully turned he’d recognised the voice and felt a sudden rush of relief. Darcy, at least, was safe. She ran out of the trees and towards him, face pale, eyes wide, and clothes muddy. Thor couldn’t help but feel a stab of disappointment that she was alone. The smaller tracks being dragged along by the booted figures had to be someone’s, of course, but he had still hoped.

Darcy threw herself at him and he enveloped her in his arms. She was shaking. He could not be sure if it was cold or shock or fear, but he guessed it to be all three, and he detached his cloak and wrapped it about her shoulders.

‘Do not fear. You are safe,’ he said. 

Darcy let out a sob. ‘They took Jane!’ she said. ‘Thor, I- they-’

‘Darcy,’ he said slowly, carefully, pushing down the instinct to hurry her. She was not used to this life. He leaned back and held her arms gently, looking her in the eye, suppressing his own fear and even pushing down the wind. ‘Breathe deeply. We will find her, I promise you that.’ Darcy gulped and swallowed, but gave a nod. ‘Now please tell me what you saw. Take the time you need. I am here to protect you.’

‘I was- I was getting some stuff from the car when I heard- these guys. Coming out the woods. Ten. Fifteen. Black uniform. Machine guns.’ She shuddered in his arms. ‘I don’t know. Lots. I ran. I should have- Jane- They wanted her. They called her ‘the scientist’. They shot at me when I ran. They took her and I- I should have helped.’

‘You did exactly as you should have done,’ said Thor carefully. Darcy seemed to shake her head and duck her gaze. Thor squeezed her arms and ducked to gain back her attention. ‘No, Darcy, there was nothing you could have done against that many. If you had stayed you would have been killed or held hostage and used to compel Jane to do whatever it is they want from her.’ Darcy shivered again. Thor did not release his grip on her but he did turn to the sky. ‘Heimdall, if you can spare an eye, then I ask you this: find Jane. I will be more in your debt than you can imagine.’

‘Thor, why the hell are you in rural Saskatchewan?’ said Stark in his ear. ‘There are no security cameras anywhere. There’s barely even any internet.’

‘Jane’s work,’ said Thor abruptly. ‘Have you anything _useful_ , Stark?’

‘That one last signal from her phone when she called you. She was south of here, near to- Jane I knew I liked you. It’s near an airport. Let me see if there are- No, no cameras because of course there aren’t. Wouldn’t it be nice if Canada joined this century? Maybe I should set up a charity-’

‘Stark,’ growled Thor.

‘Air traffic control has a Gulfstream-IV taking off four hours ago and heading south and then vanishing off the radar. Only thing bigger than a Cessna 172 taking off all day, and I think if Jane were in one of those she could punch out the window herself. Registration details are a bust, and allegedly it was going to Winnipeg but I don’t believe that. Jarvis: see what you can do.’

‘We need to find that plane,’ came Steve’s voice through the earpiece. ‘What can this Heimdall do, Thor?’

‘He can see all things,’ said Thor. 

‘Well isn’t that problem solved?’ That was Natasha. ‘From what Darcy said, my money’s on Hydra so we need to find her.’

‘No,’ said Thor shortly. ‘He sees ten trillion people across the Nine Realms. Locating one is difficult.’

‘Well, good of Jane to give us a mobile signal then,’ said Stark. ‘I’m going to look for other weird signals that might be Jane trying to say hello.’

Thor glanced down at Darcy, still pale and shivering. He would have to leave her, but not there. ‘Natasha, tell me, where is your nearest safe house?’

‘Aren’t you in the middle of nowhere?’ asked Natasha. ‘You can’t just assume I have a safe house everywhere, you know.’

‘That is why I said “nearest”,’ said Thor.

Natasha sighed. ‘Uh, about three-hundred and fifty kilometres away,’ she said.

Stark hooted with laughter. ‘You actually have a safe house in the middle of goddamned Saskatchewan, don’t you?’

Natasha gave a dignified sniff. ‘It’s been very useful,’ she said.

~*~

Even carrying a human who could not withstand his faster speeds, depositing Darcy safely in Natasha’s secured residence did not take Thor long. She did not protest his leaving, but obtained from him a promise that he would remain in touch, and she looked a little as though she were about to cry. 

Truthfully, Thor had nowhere to be, but he left and took flight once more. He needed to feel as though he were moving. For all his reassurances to Darcy, he was now at the mercy of Stark or Heimdall, and the waiting did not sit well with him. Instead he travelled back the way he had come, to the airport from which Jane’s final phone message had been sent. He found four black jeeps near the small runway. They were stripped clean, but Thor studied them carefully before taking off and flying south, as the craft Stark had traced had done.

He thought of Jane as he had left her, two days before: bright-eyed and busy. She was part way through many different papers, but had nonetheless uprooted them to the north of Prince Albert, Saskatchewan at the first sign of something new in the skies. There, that last morning, she had received an invitation to speak at an institution called MIT, which he knew was highly regarded; as well as news that she was being considered for the International Medal from the Institute of Physics for her work on wormhole detection. She had been pleased with both, and had spent much time kissing him in celebration. The call from the Avengers had been unfortunately timed, but that was his life. 

Face set grimly, he tightened his grip on Mjolnir. ‘I will find you, Jane.’ His voice was lost in the wind.

~*~

The sun had begun to set when Stark’s voice sounded once more. ‘It looks like there’s a radiation leak near Hazelton, Wyoming,’ he said.

‘I am sure you can resolve it without me,’ said Thor through gritted teeth.

‘No, you’re missing the point: it’s a National Forest. There’s a radiation leak where there isn’t a nuclear plant, silo, or any sort of structure at all. Something weird is happening. And a Gulfstream-IV with records saying it came from California touched down at a nearby airstrip a few hours back. It might be nothing. I don’t know. It’s the best I’ve got right now. We’re getting on the Quinjet anyway.’

‘Very well,’ said Thor. ‘I am close. I shall see you there.’

‘Be careful,’ came Rhodey’s voice. ‘This smells like a Hydra base, and we’re not going to be there for a while.’

‘Yeah, save a few of the bad guys for us,’ said Steve.

Thor gave a grim smile and grunt of assent, then turned sharply, and sped up. He was not prepared to wait if there was any chance Jane was in danger.

As he closed in on the area Stark had indicated, he could feel the radiation leak. It was not strong enough to harm or even to irritate, but he had to wonder at its effect on Jane, if she were there. He seemed to recall that mortals could not sense radiation such as this, even though it harmed them. The area itself though seemed empty of humans: scrubland led to forest and up ahead, a mountain rose out of the trees. Wherever this came from, it was secret and presumably underground. If it were Hydra, no doubt they could already see him.

Impatient, Thor called upon dark grey clouds to gather about him, to make sure they knew he was there. He landed, dropped Mjolnir and strode forward. If he could draw them out then he would know where they were. He could not hope that they would be that foolish, but it would be easier than digging through the earth with his bare hands.

‘I know you’re there!’ he shouted into the sky. ‘Come out and fight!’

Thunder rumbled, the only noise in the silence that followed.

A shape soared through the sky from fifty feet in front of him in a perfect arc, and crashed into his head, making him blink, then fell to the floor. 

‘It will take more than that to harm the Mighty Thor!’ he shouted, although he braced himself for an explosion at his feet. 

It did not come, and Thor looked down at the projectile with a scowl. It was cylindrical canister, the size of a tin of beans. For a second nothing happened, then the canister popped apart, and a noxious green gas sprayed upwards in a cloud, enveloping him. Thor inhaled before he could stop himself and coughed a couple of times. What sort of attack was-?

His knees gave. He passed out. His last thought was surprise.

~*~

When Thor came to, he kept his eyes closed and remained still and lifeless. It seemed as though he lost nothing by continuing to pretend he was weaker than he was. He had no desire to experience more of the green gas, after all. His body told him it had only been a few minutes since he had been knocked out, but even that was still a great achievement on Hydra’s part.

He was, he realised, being carried, and his arms and legs were both weighed down by restraints, arms behind his back. He peered through half-shut eyes to squint at the bulky metal cuffs on his ankles. They were, he suspected, designed for use on the Avengers, for they looked stronger than most restraints on this realm. There were four men carrying him, but judging from the number he could see in front of him - all heavily armed - and hear behind him, he had an entourage that numbered at least twenty.

‘I don’t like this,’ he heard one of his guards mutter.

‘Shut up,’ said the other one.

‘If he wakes up we’re fucked.’

‘Those chains are Hulk-proof,’ replied the second.

‘Yeah, but we’ve never actually put the Hulk in them.’ Suppressing a grin, Thor very carefully moved his arms and found that they gave slightly. He did not think Bruce’s other form would have any issues at all with them. ‘We should have left him outside.’

‘Look, shut up, you know the plan,’ said the second. ‘We need some leverage and dumbass here showed up at just the right time.’

Ignoring the insult and wondering what they meant by leverage, Thor opened one hand very slightly and felt for Mjolnir. Even at the distance, he could feel it shift, but he quickly dropped his pull. For now he maintained the pretense of helplessness.

‘I can’t believe that anyone would sleep with him,’ came the first voice, with something akin to disgust. ‘He’s an alien. A freak. Who knows what he is?’ Thor suppressed a rude reply.

‘Yeah, well, who cares?’ said a third. ‘The bitch is no loss. Look at what she is. All we need is her to behave for five minutes then we can kill him.’

White hot fury warred with a rush of relief at the words. They were talking about Jane, they had to be, and for whatever reason they were taking him to her. Biting his tongue, suppressing his strong desire to give his captors what they deserved on behalf of Jane, Thor continued to feign helplessness, blood boiling. How dare they talk about Jane like that?

Shortly, the walking stopped, and a new voice greeted his captors. ‘Good, you have him. Get him upright.’

Deciding this might be an opportune moment to awaken so he might see what was happening, Thor let out a faked groan and rolled over, careful not to accidentally damage the cuffs as he wished to still appear to be caught. He heard guns being cocked and intakes of breath from all around him, but he remained on the floor, opening his eyes to stare up as his captors as blearily as he was able. They did indeed look much like Hydra.

‘To his feet,’ ordered the newest voice - the commander judging by his uniform.

Thor made a token protest, faking a strain the cuffs and a struggle interjected by a coughing fit.

‘Good,’ said the commander. ‘This has been a useful test of our work here. The gas did affect him as we’d hoped. Get him to the window.’

‘I will kill you all,’ said Thor, feeling as though some words might be expected of him. ‘When I escape, you’ll regret it!’

‘Quiet,’ ordered the commander. ‘You are irrelevant.’

The ‘window’ they brought Thor in front of was blackened glass, pitted with bullet holes and cracks, but only on one side. Despite this, it appeared to be holding strong. They pushed him against it, and he felt metal gun barrels at his back.

‘Dr Foster,’ said the commander, into an intercom device.

‘Little busy, jackass,’ came Jane’s voice, and Thor’s heart sung. 

‘If you would be so good as to put down the visible shields, we have someone we would like you to see.’

A pause. The black window became transparent. Thor could see through into a large room filled with computers and screens. He cared not for them, though, for inside was Jane. She, like Darcy, looked bruised, pale and dirty. She was sitting by one of the computers, evidently hard at work. Her eyes found Thor’s. He beamed at her.

‘If you do not cease what you are doing and unlock the door to that room, we will have your boyfriend shot,’ snarled the commander. ‘He can survive many things, but I doubt even he can live through a hundred rounds to his head.’

That was probably true. All the same, Thor winked at Jane. Her eyes widened very slightly.

‘Oh, he’s not my boyfriend,’ she said. She turned back to the computer and began typing again. For some reason that only made Thor love her even more. However had she got there and locked herself in? She was perfect.

For a second there was silence. Their captors were evidently unprepared for this. Thor opened his hand to summon Mjolnir.

‘What?’ said the commander at last.

‘Don’t you read _Us Weekly_?’ said Jane, not looking up from her machine. ‘We broke up weeks ago. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want you to kill anyone, but I’m not letting you in here, assholes.’

Grinning, feeling Mjolnir begin to break through concrete above his head, Thor wrested his arms free, to shouts of fear. Shots rang out, but he ducked and smashed the men to the side, then reached up for his hammer and his storm and lightning and _crashed_ it to the ground. He heard screams, felt the floor shatter, saw the glass which had survived bullets shatter and blow inwards into the other room, and felt the bright light that ran through his bones lick outwards and burn through everything.

At last, the lightning vanished. The two rooms were now in complete darkness, his magic having destroyed their electrical circuits. Above his head, through the hole in the ceiling which Mjolnir had created, he could see the clouds and feel one or two droplets of rain begin to make their way down to him. Around him, the bodies of the Hydra soldiers lay, but he did not care.

‘Jane?’ he called, voice suddenly wavering. Dark as it was he should be able to see her silhouette and he could not.

‘Right here,’ she said. A shadow appeared up from behind a bank of computers and began to scramble towards him. He reached forward through the broken window until she was in his arms. Even in the pitch black her lips found his with wonderful ease, and he lifted her from the ground and then carefully through the broken window to better kiss her.

A spark from the overhead lights made her pull back, even though he tried to follow her. ‘We should… leave,’ said Jane. She was shivering in his arms, which only made him hold her more tightly, resting their faces together. Jane sighed and leaned into him for a moment. ‘I love you,’ she said. ‘Thank you. I was… I’m scared. They- I don’t want-’ She broke off and buried her face in his neck.

‘I won’t let anyone harm you, Jane,’ he said, clutching at her tightly, unwilling to let go. It felt like a false promise even now, but he refused to think of that. He tightened his grip.

‘We still- we have to go,’ she said at last, leaning back. ‘There’s more Hydra here. And also I was sort of half trying to overload their reactor - mostly just to scare them. I wasn’t actually going to blow the building. But if your explosion kicked that off then we’re a bit screwed.’ 

Thor blinked. ‘Yes, perhaps we should leave,’ he agreed with alacrity. ‘Steve, Stark - we may need the Avengers to prevent a nuclear explosion from harming a National Forest.’

He heard Stark sigh in his ear. ‘I hate your girlfriend.’

‘Oops,’ said Jane guiltily. 

Thor grinned all the same and kissed her nose. ‘Hold on,’ he said, placing her back onto the floor. ‘I will make the hole in the ceiling bigger.’

‘Oh boy,’ said Jane, as he positioned himself directly under it. ‘Don’t you have a helmet you should be wearing? I’m pretty sure you have a helmet you should be wearing.’

‘I’ll be fine,’ said Thor fondly. He loved that she worried. He peered up at the Mjolnir-sized hole that ran through several feet of concrete and several more of earth and he winced. Then he glanced over at the shadow of Jane as he summoned his helm. She was, after all, very intelligent, and there seemed no reason for him to begin questioning that then and there.

~*~

Later, the Avengers and Jane sat in a diner in Hazelton, Wyoming. Stark had shut off the radiation leak, while the others had apprehended the remaining Hydra warriors and Jane had called Darcy. Mercifully, Thor’s interference with the base’s electronics following Jane’s did not cause any significant catastrophe, although that had not stopped Stark from angrily muttering through the comms throughout much of the venture.

Thor ate little. Now that it was all over, his fears and worries should have been gone in the thrill of victory, but his stomach still churned uneasily over his inability to protect Jane. That she had escaped on her own was a comfort, but he feared this was just the beginning. She was not merely his girlfriend, but she was clever and important for her own work, and the realm was beginning to learn of that. She was in danger on two fronts, and he could not be there as he ought. 

‘Why did they want you?’ Steve asked Jane, once Thor had relayed what he’d seen and done.

‘My work,’ Jane replied. ‘Assholes. They want to be able to control wormholes because they don’t want aliens attacking. I guess only they get to have dreams of world domination. Jackass Nazi shitheads.’ She had stopped shaking, and much of her earlier fear seemed to have become anger. Thor could hardly stop himself from smiling at her as she spoke. 

‘How did you get out?’ Stark asked.

‘They gave me a computer. Talk about dumbasses. I mean, they’d disabled the wifi via software, which was a nice try I guess, but their entire facility was controlled via their network so once I got in, I could go where I wanted. I just found the most secure computer room and locked myself in. Turns out Hydra aren’t much better at securing their servers than SHIELD were.’ 

‘We weren’t that bad,’ said Barton, in what Thor thought might be a mere token protest.

‘You guys were OK, security-wise, as government organisations go,’ said Tony. ‘I’ve had better. But I’ve also had worse. Ask Rhodey about the Senate Security Review some time.’

‘That was hilarious right up until the part where I still get Senators calling me to complain about you,’ said Rhodey. ‘They think I’m your babysitter or something.’

Stark grinned.

Jane reached into her pocket and produced a small plastic device that Thor recognised as a data storage drive. ‘I didn’t quite get their whole database,’ she said. ‘But I downloaded a bunch of stuff that should help with your Hydra hide-and-seek.’

Stark grinned and snatched it from her hand, plugging it into park of the shoulder of his iron suit. ‘You know what to do, Jarvis,’ he said.

Jane settled back to eating her fries, and Thor settled back to watching her carefully. She was resilient, his Jane. Resilient and brave and quite wonderful. He just wished she would never have cause to be again. 

Everyone ate - or didn’t eat - in silence for a few minutes.

‘Hey, sorry,’ said Jane at last, to Thor. ‘About the whole, we-broke-up-so-go-ahead-and-shoot-him thing. That was very, um, practical, I guess. As opposed to, you know, nice. Or romantic. Or a thing a good girlfriend would do.’

Thor laughed and leaned down to kiss the corner of her mouth. ‘I love you for all your practicalities,’ he said. ‘I would not have you change at all.’

‘Can you two not get a room?’ said Rhodey. ‘Bad enough I get this from Tony and Pepper. I’m trying to eat here.’

Jane gave Thor a grin. ‘Well I did see a motel down the road,’ she pointed out. He grinned in response and gave her another soft kiss, aware that would irritate his companions but not caring in the face of having her returned to him.

‘I am not that bad,’ said Tony.

‘You’re way worse,’ said Jane.

‘You are in no position to judge,’ said Natasha. ‘All four of you are terrible.’

Jane took her last bite of burger. ‘Well then,’ she said. ‘We won’t offend your eyes any more. Come on, Thor.’ She extended a hand to him.

Smiling, he took her hand and got to his feet. ‘I would follow you anywhere,’ he said, ignoring someone groaning with disgust behind him.

 

** Four **

If Jane had been asked what the most unlikely thing about her current relationship was, she probably wouldn’t even have said dating an alien superhero. She’d always known aliens were out there, after all, and her formative years reading Star Trek fanfiction had left her fairly open minded where biology was concerned. In that respect Thor was actually a little bit more normal than what fourteen year old Jane had considered reasonable for a relationship.

No, the most unlikely thing was dating a guy who _really liked_ going to the gym.

It was not, of course, just any gym. He had special weights bought from Asgard in the Stark Tower gym. He also brought artificially intelligent robots to do fight training with. And he threw his friends through walls when they didn’t just let him fight the robots because of what she was pretty confident was an ego thing. When he wasn’t on Avengers missions, he spent at least three hours a day training, often more. He could run fifty miles in an hour. He could pick up trucks. He could swim around the entire Manhattan island in a couple of hours. He was a machine. And after that, he would come home to Jane, hardly a hair out of place, and still find the energy to cook her dinner and then coax her to the bedroom. The bedroom where she was _still_ the one getting out of breath first. She’d upped her gym routine from twenty minutes twice a week to thirty minutes three times a week in pursuit of more sex.

Fortunately, as unlikely as Thor’s gym-bunny status was, he didn’t harp on about it the way some people she knew did. It was just a thing he did. 

‘I enjoy it, of course,’ he’d told her, when she’d asked him. ‘I can think. I can relax. I can make plans. And if I am angry or frustrated then it is calming. But also I cannot forget the importance of what I do: every tiny improvement during training might save the life of another the next time I must do battle. I will defend these realms with all I have, just as you will understand them with all you have.’

She’d smiled and kissed him. He had a way of seeing the importance in what she did, and she loved him for it. 

Since he tended to fit in his training while she was working, it didn’t really impact their relationship. In fact, she didn’t even really notice he’d gone from about three hours a day to about six hours a day until Steve pointed it out to her. He was on his way back from the tower gym when he caught her in the lab she’d claimed as her own whenever she and Thor were in New York.

‘I think he’s fine,’ said Steve. ‘But if he were a human I’d be a bit worried. I get a couple of exercise magazines and sometimes they talk about… exercise addictions and low self esteem and-’ He broke off when he saw Jane’s incredulity as he said “low self esteem”. ‘Yeah, yeah, I know. Like I said: I think he’s fine. I just wasn’t sure if you knew of anything. He wasn’t in the tower today but he flew off somewhere and was gone for about seven hours and when he got back he looked like an icicle.’

Jane frowned and looked at the clock. Had she really been working for that long? Oops. 

‘I hadn’t exactly noticed,’ she admitted, squirming in her chair and trying to hide her embarrassment. Thor could do what he wanted. It just felt like something she should probably at least have clocked, being his girlfriend. ‘I’ll ask him I guess,’ she said. 

Back in their apartment, Thor was humming and eating toast as he cooked them dinner: some sort of tomatoey stew in a huge pan on the hob, plus something huge covered in foil in the oven.

‘Hey, you,’ said Jane. He smiled in greeting and leaned down to kiss her. He tasted like raspberry jam and she kissed him again on the strength of it. ‘What’s for dinner?’

‘This stew is a recipe I know from Asgard,’ he said, as he chopped potatoes. ‘And there is a rack of venison in the oven.’

‘Just enough for two, then,’ remarked Jane with a snort. He grinned. ‘Thank you. It smells amazing.’ She leaned in and rested her head on his arm. ‘You been to the gym today?’ she asked as casually as possible.

‘Not precisely,’ said Thor. ‘I flew up to Hudson Bay for a swim.’

Jane blinked and leaned back to look up at him. Steve had said _icicle_ , after all. ‘Isn’t it… frozen at this time of year?’

He nodded. ‘It was quite refreshing. It is beginning to melt, though. I simply hit a hole in the ice when I wished for air.’

‘Of course you did,’ said Jane, and Thor laughed. She shook her head and stepped away to grab a couple of beers from the fridge, one of which she offered to Thor.

Thor accepted his drink, then reached for her hand and pulled her into his embrace again. ‘It was a little cold,’ he conceded. ‘And I met a polar bear who was not thrilled to see me, but since they are endangered I elected to swim away rather than fight.’

‘Honestly, I can’t even tell any more if you’re real,’ said Jane. He grinned and kissed her nose. ‘Steve said- uh- Steve said you’ve been training a lot more lately,’ she said. ‘Is everything… OK?’

Thor frowned slightly. ‘Oh, had I not mentioned?’ She shook her head. ‘There is an event. Like your Olympics I suppose. It is held on a world called Jrenbo, roughly every twelve of your years. I usually join the Asgardians to display our talents.’ He grinned. ‘I receive much acclaim for my physical abilities.’

Jane laughed and poked his ribs. ‘Your ego,’ she said. He was still grinning. ‘Well that’s good. I guess when Steve said I was worried you were taking losing a fight badly or something.’

‘I never lose fights,’ said Thor complacently, which was a huge lie but she let it slide since he had apparently outswum a polar bear that day. He squeezed her middle all the same. ‘I thank you for your concern.’

After dinner, which somehow had no leftovers at all, he brought up the alien not-Olympics again. ‘Before I train too much, it occurs to me that I should ask your permission to take part,’ he said.

‘My… permission?’ said Jane, frowning.

He paused for a moment, seeming to consider his words. ‘Jrenbo is a beautiful world, but it has a strict social hierarchy,’ he explained. ‘The biology of the natives means that it is hard for them to have children. Athletes are only permitted to take part if they are… not in a relationship. Otherwise it is considered that they should be either looking after the next generation or, er, bringing about the next generation. They should not be wasting their energy on such competitions.’

‘Wait, are you asking if we can very briefly pretend to break up again?’ said Jane with a laugh. ‘Isn’t that against the spirit of all the babymaking we should be doing?’

‘Perhaps slightly,’ said Thor. He looked apologetic. ‘I will not be offended if you would rather I did not compete,’ he said.

‘Don’t be silly,’ said Jane. She had pretended to break up with him to get publicity for her book, after all. ‘It’s a totally sensible reason. Of course you can.’ She paused for a second. ‘Maybe you could get tickets for a very good friend of yours to watch.’ She did her best to bat her eyelashes. It wasn’t something she was particularly good at, but Thor seemed to get the message and smiled.

‘I am sure I can.’

Jane beamed. ‘Space Olympics!’ she said, as much to herself as to Thor. Then she paused. ‘Wait, does this mean we can’t have sex for the duration?’

‘We will be housed in separate apartments if I am to compete,’ said Thor. He coughed. ‘It is only for a few weeks.’

Jane raised an eyebrow. ‘A few weeks is a higher proportion of my life than it is of course,’ she reminded him. He looked like he was trying not to laugh. ‘Fine, whatever, space Olympics where I’m taking my Rampant Rabbit.’

At that, he really did laugh. Jane decided not to point out that if she showed up at his separate apartment, she didn’t think he’d take a whole lot of convincing to give up on pretending to be single. Even if he did have hundreds of miles to run or swim or fight through the next day. That was, after all, the advantage of dating a superhero who knew exactly how good he was. 

 

** Five **

Ever since his banishment, Thor had done his best to temper his inclination to rush into his decisions, and he had tried to give his father’s age and wisdom the respect it deserved. He had to think of more than just himself and his emotions. He had Midgard, Asgard and all the other realms to consider. Mostly he achieved this goal. Or at least, he did better than he had done.

Then one day he was almost crushed by a giant robot.

It had been some old Hydra weapon stolen by a group of terrorists - a robotic device one hundred feet high, piloted from inside. Thor had been fighting it from the skies, until it had smashed him into the ground. Then a well - or perhaps poorly, depending on perspective - timed attack from Iron Man had sent it crashing on top of him. Then a building had fallen on top of them. Then it had taken five hours to locate and dig him out.

Thor did not know any of this until many hours after, of course. All he knew was blackness interspersed with pain. He drifted in and out of consciousness. He saw his mother, his brother, his father. He saw Jane. He saw Sif and the Warriors. They fell through contorted scenes with him, dead one minute, alive the next, then vanished as quickly as they’d come.

Then he saw a bright light.

_Thor?_

He groaned. Pain returned. Limbs didn’t move - wouldn’t move. He was pressed down, crushed in place. He sucked in a short shallow breath.

‘Thor, we’ve got you.’ A momentary pause. ‘He’s over here! I need a hand!’

‘Sleeping,’ he told the voice. Even words hurt, ripped from lungs with blood pooling in them.

‘Buddy, gonna need you to reach up and give me your hands,’ said the voice.

Thor ignored it. One hand was pinned. The other hurt. He shut his eyes.

‘Thor? Stay with me!’

‘Thor, right this second your girlfriend is tripping over an unstable broken building, breathing in asbestos, just to try and get to you. Maybe do her a favour and give us your hand so we can get you out before she falls in a hole.’

Gritting his teeth, Thor opened his eyes once more to find himself glaring up at Steve and Tony. He sucked in as much breath as he could, swung up with his free hand and _roared_ in pain as he used the other to push away the metal girder that weight it and his chest down.

Warm hands clung to his one, then cool metal armour reached down to haul his other arm. He felt his shoulders strain, his legs scream. He shouted again, kicked out, reached for Mjolnir which had lain somewhere beneath him, and felt a sudden, brief rush of victory as he was dragged from the hole in the ground. Air rushed into his lungs, lightning licked at his fingers.

Then he toppled forward and was stopped only by Steve’s arm around him. The edges of his vision were fuzzy, like a dream.

‘THOR!’ Jane appeared, scrambling over piles of metal and concrete. Thor felt himself smile, even as darkness began to encroach once more.

‘Jane,’ he managed, though it came out more of a groan. His eyes fell shut, but he felt her cool hands on his face and he leaned into them. ‘I’ve- I’ve thought- we should wed. Will you marry me?’

He passed out before he heard her answer.

~*~

‘-got concussion.’

‘Well, maybe, but I still think he wants to marry you for real.’

‘I am not holding him to something he said after being crushed by a robot.’

‘Also a building. Don’t forget the building.’

‘Yeah, thanks Darcy, I wouldn’t want to forget the _building_ , would I?’

‘He’ll be fine. Everyone says he’s healing. Tony’s super jealous of how quickly it’s going.’

‘Tony can go to hell.’ There was a slight sniffling sound.

Thor, weighed down by warm blankets and cocooned in light, struggled to force his eyes open. It was comfortable. He would rather sleep. But Jane was sad.

‘Jane,’ he managed.

‘ _Thor_!’ A sudden weight and shadow as she appeared atop him. He tried to smile but it was difficult.

‘Love you,’ he mumbled. She pressed her forehead against his and he sighed happily. Everything was warm and safe and fuzzy. He could feel sleep beginning to catch up upon him. ‘Not concussed,’ he added. ‘Want to marry.’

‘You’re on enough morphine that the state of New York is having a shortage,’ said Jane. He wasn’t sure what that had to do with anything.

‘Next week?’ he offered.

He heard her laugh softly and felt her squeeze him. ‘I’ve got some lectures.’

He grinned. ‘Week after?’

Her hand stroked his face, pushing hair back and smoothing his beard. ‘OK, fine, the week after,’ she said. ‘Get some sleep.’

‘Hold you to that,’ he muttered.

He thought he heard Darcy laugh as he once again fell unconscious.

~*~

When he awoke the next time, the dreaminess around the edges of his head had begun to recede. He _ached_ , but experience told him that was good. He lived, and his mind had returned to sense and wakefulness. Even taking in a breath hurt. He judged he had been unconscious for a while though, for it was a dull ache. He was healing.

He sucked in a breath and opened his eyes. Now he was awake and his faculties har returned, he realised he was in one of the healing rooms at Stark Tower. Jane slept beside his bed - slumped forward on a chair with her head against his arm. He was loath to disturb her but thought she would wish for him to do so.

‘Jane,’ he whispered, voice hoarse and uneven. He reached for her, and found his hand more ungainly than he expected. What he’d planned to be a gentle awakening was more akin to a poke in the eye. ‘Sorry, I did not intend to-’

‘You’re up!’ she interrupted, again throwing herself half on top of him. He had strength and dexterity enough to wrap his arms around her and he sighed into her shoulder.

‘I am fine,’ he said.

‘ _Really_?’ Her sarcasm was tinged with genuine fear and he stroked her back, then leaned backwards to look at her face.

‘I will be. I am healing.’

Her hands were shaking as she touched his face, his hair, his shoulders. ‘You better be,’ she said at last. He heard a slight wobble in her voice and he tightened his hold around her back, watching her carefully. Under his gaze, she shot him a small, tight smile. ‘I know you heal,’ she said, ‘but you were out for a really long time.’ He went to kiss her, but missed and hit her nose instead.

‘Jane, while I was…’ He paused as he failed to find an appropriate phrase. ‘I asked you something.’

‘Oh, er, right, it’s OK. You were concussed. We can, like, not talk about it.’

Thor frowned. ‘I was not concussed,’ he said.

‘You’d been hit by a robot. And a building. And then been given enough drugs to kill, like, eight thousand people.’

Thor considered this. ‘Perhaps I was a little concussed,’ he acknowledged. ‘But if so, I am not any more and my feelings are unchanged. Fate has brought us together and I would not have it tear us apart.’

‘Um,’ said Jane. ‘Are you…? Is this…? How many fingers am I holding up?’

‘Four,’ he said. Then reached for her hand to kiss it, a little more sloppily than he’d like but not, he felt, without a certain finesse. ‘Jane, I love you. More than I thought possible or even probable. There are a dozen reasons for you to say no, so know that I will understand if you do, but together I believe we can fight them all.’

‘Including your dad?’ she managed. She was staring at him as though he’d lost his mind. He supposed that was at least a little true, although he could not bring himself to care.

He grinned. ‘Absolutely. Will you marry me?’

‘Um,’ she said. ‘Yes?’ She smiled at him. 

His heart leapt in his chest. She was the most beautiful thing in all the realms. ‘Really?’

‘Week after next,’ she said, biting her lip as her smiled broadened. ‘ _I_ wasn’t concussed or on morphine, you know.’ Then she kissed him, and he found that he clung onto her as if his very life depended on it.

~*~

They did not wed two weeks after he’d asked her. Jane’s mother was busy that week, so they delayed it very slightly to the week after. Jane was due to go to Amsterdam the week after that, to teach a class for three months. Darcy has said they could be like “normal people” and wait a few months, but Jane didn’t seem inclined to, and Thor would have been happy with anything that made her happy. She didn’t want a big fuss, after all. She just wanted to marry him. And that was more than he’d ever hoped and all he cared about.

~*~

Two weeks after they had married (and a week after the tabloid newspapers had published rumours of their nuptials), Thor received a missive from his father requesting his and Jane’s presence. 

‘He’s found out,’ he told Jane over the phone. He had planned to join her in Amsterdam that weekend, but the message necessitated a new plan. ‘He has spies on Midgard, and they will have seen the rumours on the internet. Or perhaps Heimdall has been forced to report something. I consider that unlikely, though, for I suspect Heimdall would have found some way to warn me.’

Jane sucked in a breath. ‘So either we tell him where to shove it,’ she said, ‘or we lie through our asses.’

Thor considered his father briefly. ‘I’m going to ask Natasha for some assistance,’ he said.

Jane let out a short laugh. ‘We’ll have to tell him eventually,’ she said.

‘And you will have to tell your grandmother eventually,’ said Thor reasonably.

‘OK, fine, lying is good,’ said Jane. 

~*~

Odin Allfather’s greeting was abrupt, and his manner irritable. 

‘I have been informed that there are those on Midgard who make reports of your marriage,’ he said. ‘Is this true? Have you done this without my permission?’

‘Father, I have made many foolish decisions without your permission or your blessing,’ said Thor, as smoothly as he could. ‘Do you really believe this is one of them?’

‘I hardly know what to believe,’ snapped his father. ‘You have committed treason once for that woman-’ At his side, Thor felt Jane tense and he felt his own muscles tightening.

‘I am not married to Jane,’ he interrupted loudly. ‘And I will thank you to be civil about the matter.’ 

His father watched him carefully in the silence that followed.

‘Good,’ he said eventually. ‘A dalliance is one thing, but she will never be Queen.’

‘I don’t _want_ to be Queen,’ said Jane, folding her arms and scowling up at him.

‘Even better,’ said Odin briskly.

~*~

Outside the throne room, Sif caught up with them as Jane offered Thor her hand for a high five. Sif stared in confusion as Thor gamely returned Jane’s gesture.

‘It’s a Midgard gesture of mutual triumph,’ explained Thor. Jane giggled into her fingers and he nudged her with an elbow.

‘Very… well,’ said Sif. She shook her head slightly. ‘I have never seen you tell such an open and bald-faced lie to your father. I did not know you even could.’

Thor glanced at Jane, who laughed again and gestured for him to explain.

‘I could not,’ he admitted. ‘It was not a lie.’

Sif blinked. ‘I was at your wedding,’ she said.

‘I had planned to simply lie,’ said Thor. ‘I am, however, not very talented at such endeavours. Natasha Romanoff implored me not to even try after seeing my efforts, not with as experienced a diplomat as my father. But then I remembered that the broadness of Asgard’s marriage laws mean that, as well as a marriage conducted in accordance with laws on another realm being legal, so too is a divorce.’

‘You… didn’t.’

‘We totally did,’ said Jane. ‘Nornheim has some obscure legal annulment, right Thor? Didn’t make any sense to me but I’m not the one who has apparently taken hundreds of years of law classes.’ She grinned up at Thor shaking her head slightly before turning back to Sif. ‘It took, like five minutes.’ She then offered Thor another high five.

‘I am not high-fiving our divorce,’ said Thor sternly. Jane wiggled her fingers to try and tempt him, and instead he snatched her hand and kissed it, making her giggle once more.

‘We’re going to go and get remarried, Sif,’ said Jane. ‘Want to come? We need a witness.’

‘I am not attending your second wedding in two weeks,’ said Sif incredulously.

‘Of course you are,’ said Thor, grinning. ‘You wouldn’t dream of missing such an important event in my life. I’ll pay for the drinks.’

Sif sighed very audibly and accepted the arm he offered. ‘Your father,’ she said, ‘is going to lose his mind.’

 

** And one where they didn’t... **

A rush of wind and a rustle of cloak made Jane look up from her work.

‘Thor!’ She ran to him. He was bruised and bloody and dirty, but he took her in his arms and kissed her fiercely and she clung to him. 

She’d seen and heard of some attack at Stark Tower in the news and she’d bitten off half her nails and then, at his hurried request, taken Darcy and run from all internet connections and technology. He’d not explained himself, and she’d not wanted to go, but she trusted him with her life. The stars of the desert always welcomed her, even if her fears hadn’t been calmed until then and there, with him finally with her again.

‘What happened? Are you OK?’

‘Yes, we’re OK,’ he told her, then he kissed her again.

A caravan shared with Darcy offered no privacy, so she didn’t move him towards it. Instead she stayed under the stars, and began pulling at his armour and nudged him towards where she’d been sitting, on a thin mat for a sleeping bag. It would be slightly more comfortable than the desert sand and rocks.

‘You’re here,’ he murmured, between kisses. Jane sighed into his mouth and pulled him closer, running her hands through his hair and over his beard.

‘Of course I am,’ she told him. ‘Right where I promised.’

He smiled and, perfect gentleman as ever, lowered himself down onto the mat on the desert floor and pulled her on top of him.

~*~

‘You going to tell me what happened?’ she asked later. She was still lying in his arms, still mostly dressed because the desert was cold at night. He’d kept his cloak after vanishing his armour and wrapped it around them both. He was still holding her tightly, as though he were afraid she might slip away.

‘We defeated Ultron, an artificial being of Stark’s design,’ he said at last. ‘We made new friends and allies. We destroyed the trust we’ve earned from the world. We each saw our own nightmares.’ He sighed and leaned into her neck, seeming to almost breathe her in. ‘Something is deeply wrong in the universe.’

Jane pushed herself up on him to look at his face. ‘Wrong?’

‘The Aether, the Tesseract… they are part of a bigger whole. So too was Loki’s sceptre, now held, in its own way, by a new ally.’

‘Wait, someone has the sceptre and you just let them have it?’

‘Not quite,’ said Thor. ‘I will introduce you to him. I think you will find him… interesting. He can be trusted with the fate of Midgard.’

‘Huh,’ said Jane. She watched Thor intently for a few moments. He shot her a small smile before allowing his gaze to shift up and above her head to the stars. His hands tightened momentarily on her back. ‘What else?’ she asked.

He looked back to her, eyes sad and filled with something that looked like fear. ‘I saw a sickness in Asgard,’ he said. ‘There is a grave danger. I must go, and soon.’

The air rushed out of her. ‘Oh,’ she said at last.

She felt his hands curl in the fabric of her shirt, clutching her more closely. ‘Forgive me?’ he asked at last. His voice was small.

Jane kissed him, hard. ‘There’s nothing to forgive,’ she said. ‘You’ve got a universe to save.’

He sighed and pulled her closer into him, eyes fluttering closed as he ran his hands up her back, through her hair and oh-so-gently over her face, as if he were committing her to memory. When he spoke, his voice was so, so tired. ‘Jane, I know not how long I will be absent, nor what dangers I will face. I would not wish to hold you to promises made when I could be here with you.’

Jane felt a tightness curdle in her stomach. ‘Don’t be stupid,’ she said. ‘Good fortune or adversity, remember? This counts as adversity. We both made a vow. Twice.’

She saw a flash of hope in Thor’s eyes. ‘Really?’

‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Just promise me you’ll come home as soon as you can.’

‘Home?’ he said, and then she saw a smile begin to spread across his face. ‘Yes, I will, I promise you that.’

‘Although, just as a warning,’ she said, when she pulled back, ‘if it takes you longer to get back here than it does for me to build a wormhole device, I’m coming out there and looking for you.’ Then she smiled as memory stirred. ‘Deal?’

Thor’s smile broadened. ‘Deal,’ he said, and he pulled her down to kiss him again.


End file.
